Today in a handfull of pictures

Today is getting better and better with each minute that passes. I no longer have a reason to feel like my heart is being ripped right out of my chest. It's back where it belongs and what was a break up is now just an intermission. I wait and get popcorn (or do some little projects) while he gets his living arrangements situated.


I discovered a couple of days ago that this bird house is full of baby birds. Since my discovery, my little sister has kept a very watchful eye making sure the momma bird sees her baby bird enough during the day.


This little plant by the sink has been catching my eye since I moved in and I finally took the time to take a picture.


I saw this sitting on the counter when I arrived home and the light from the setting sun made the yellow pop so well I couldn't help but take my camera out.

During intermission my to-do list is as follows:
1) finish paint by numbers
2) finish blanket for Doreen's baby
3) more personal pictures on blog
4) upload at least 50 pictures on flickr
5) clean car inside and out making her beeeeautiful and spotless
6) one collage
7) blog about how 25 by 25 is coming along

Oh goodness. Time to get crackin!

Silver Linings

Today is better. There is hope in the air. I know I go up and down as fast as a roller coaster at Six Flags and for that I apologize but I do need to get it out somewhere and sometimes doing it in a blog makes me think a little harder about the situation and it forces me to do something I love which is look through pictures.

I don't know what is to come in the future, maybe a reunion if one party is ready and the other hasn't set her mind elsewhere. Maybe not. But I'm not the basket case I was yesterday and I can talk without tears pouring out of my eyes like waterfalls.

The good thing about yesterday was I received my lovely polaroid in the mail yesterday. I have to wait until payday to buy film and then have to wait until they ship it, but having the camera itself to hold (with a case and two flash bars to boot!) was definitely something that kept my eyes dry for a minute.

Sunday night I finished a book I had been reading for a couple of weeks and so I had some time after my crying to look at my bookshelf for the next pick.

As I was looking and looking I needed something inspirational and I happened upon my favorite picture book: A Year of Mornings.



While I am not the kind to get up early in the morning the pictures are so gorgeous and I get very jealous of the authors' eye for simple beauty. It wouldn't hurt to try my hand at something similar however, so I will be uploading random photos from my day occasionally.

I hope you enjoy what I come up with.

We Heart It

I thought we weren't on the brink of a break up. But Friday got worse and worse with every hour. Sunday was the day. It had to end.
Neither of us wants it to end but it has to. He has to focus on getting his life in order. I can't help him and I can't wait around.

I know it needs to happen but I'm on the verge of tears constantly. I hate this. I want my boyfriend back.

I just want him back.

Please can this day be over, I just want to be in bed.

We Heart It

Ah yes, so the curse of the terrible Fridays has struck the A&C relationship once again. At least this time we're not on the brink of break up. At least this time we're not dealing with his horrible chest pains that scare the bejeezus out of me.
At least it's not life threatening, at least he's not in the hospital from a wreckless night,
At least....

So now what is going on:

The roommate that has his name on the lease (let's just call him douche) just gave the boy and the rest of his roommates (including his own brother) until 12 tonight to get all of their stuff out of their place. That's not even 24 hours. Seriously, what the heck? (I'm trying so hard not to cuss on any of my updates right now... it's incredibly hard.)

So instead of going to see Letters to Juliet with him like I've been looking forward to (and let me just tell you it was his idea because I went to see Nightmare on Elm Street with him, I wasn't dragging him anywhere) I'll be finding other plans for myself because he will be moving everything out of his house and then staying at a friend's house. I'm a little sketched out on the whole situation and I'm wondering just how much drama there is going to be in his life before everything settles down and we can just enjoy our relationship.

But that is incredibly selfish, his life is being thrown all around and he has to keep his footing and just keep going.

This is beyond nutter butters.

Oh yeah and I'm just about bathing in this tonight:

I really want a summer dress or two

Thanks Athropologie for making my bank account hurt at the thought of spill cash for this pretty little thing. I'll probably go to Forever 21 to find something instead but this dress is just so pretty.


p.s. Dear Friday what have you done with my boyfriend? I might forgo the soda and get some liquor instead tonight if you don't give him back.

Photo location

Day three of no soda. Tomorrow at noon I can say I am halfway done. Will my stomach be less pouchy? Who knows!
In other news, my dear bf went off on a 21 run with a friend of his and I do not know if they made it through to see this morning. I'm hoping yes but Fridays have not been good for me the past three weeks in a row so I'm a bit skeptical. I keep trying to tell myself that no matter how long I stare at my phone that little light won't turn red unless someone actually texts. I can't do it with my mind.

Oh Fridays you've been rude lately. Can we play a little nicer this time around? I don't want to cry.

<3 C

DAY 1: Give up the soda for a week.

It must be done. It must, must, must. I stayed drug and alcohol free for so many years and I can't kick a Diet Coke addiction.
It is a little crazy how nuts I go for this syrup-y crap.

Well, the next 7 days it is out! I hear your stomach gets a little flatter after you stop drinking it. Bloat and such.

Sorry this isn't a pretty post but definitely necessary.

I am 100% a shopaholic. Horrible, really quite horrible but I loooove cameras and I really wanted a SX-70 and this one is all pretty and white with a rainbow ribbon...

I'm in love.

I can't wait for it to arrive in the mail!

I just hope that by the time I get it and have more money there will still be some of the TZ film left in the IMPOSSIBLE PROJECT store.

I LOVE LOVE LOVE plastic cameras. I'm getting to the point of problems for sure.

<3

We Heart It

I'm so excited. I've acquired yet another toy camera. Stoked beyond belief. My new baby is a 35mm Holga. I've started shooting random things with her. She's such a toy. The click her shutter release makes is just precious. I wish I knew more about her. I'm also looking to obtain a Holga 120 sometime in the near future.

To understand my new toys a tid bit better I bought a book on plastic camera photography. I hope it helps a little. I love photography in general but know only bits and pieces.

Hopefully this will lead me down a long road full of glorious pictures that I take instead of just collecting the ones that other people take.

Yay to new and exciting adventures...

Coming soon: 25 before 25 updates!

We Heart It

I've been holding a lot inside lately. A lot good, a lot bad, a lot in between. I guess I should get it out but I don't have one good outlet for it all. It's mumbled and jumbled in my head and don't get my wrong, all in all I'm happy but my nights aren't one continuous sleep. When my slumber is interrupted and I have to open a window to get the cold air to clear my head I know I need to let some stuff out. Problem is, I don't.
I'm trying but as I get older and get into new situations it gets harder and harder to find the perfect avenues in which to communicate while keeping everybody happy and guarding secrets as best as I can.

My boyfriend is amazing and I adore him. Things are great. But even a bunch of good feelings can become overwhelming and sometimes when you put things on pedestals they disappoint. Not the fault of the other, just the mistake of placing it so high in the first place.

My room at my new house (moved back in with Mom to pay off the good ol' credit card debt) is so very messy and unorganized and I have no want to do anything to fix it lately. All I want to do is spend time with the new significant other but I haven't really be able to do that either.

I'm sorry, this post seems down, I'm just drained and probably hungry and last week was a whirlwind and this week is recovery and I guess I'm just going to do it one day at a time.

Do I have any other choice?