Killing the Blues

I love this movie!

My movies to watch on bad days:
-The Notebook
-The Go-Getter
-The Royal Tenenbaums
-Jennifer's Body

I watch these when I've been feeling really uninspired, lonely, frustrated or sad. (I also watch these movies on good days but it's rare.)
Tonight I watched The Go-Getter, I wanted the feel of Portland and simplicity. I wanted Zooey Deschanel sipping soda from a straw and dipping fries in ketchup (my all time favorite scene from the movie, can't explain why but it pops in my head probably at least once every two weeks even when I haven't watched the movie). To say I watched it is a bit of an exaggeration however. I watched my favorite parts. The parts I found the most inspiring and comforting. I didn't watch the parts that mildly distress me, I just wasn't in the mood.
I do this often with certain movies. The Notebook for instance... I don't watch the very end anymore. Mostly because when I want to watch it I'm desperate for a happy love story and don't want to cry. So I watch the parts of when they were young. There's so much I find inspiring about Rachel McAdams character in that movie, I'm just enchanted by her completely. And I'd be lying if I said I wasn't in LOVE with young Noah. So handsome and endearing how he goes after her. One day I want someone to love me as much as he loved her. I know it's a movie but a girl can still dream.

Two movies that will be added to the list when they come out:
-Going the Distance
-Easy A

Funny, awesome love(ish) stories. Can't wait. Seriously.

Last but not least, TV shows I watch when I'm feeling a bit blue:
- The OC Season 1
- Gilmore Girls (any season but the older Rory gets the more I like it, more easy to relate to maybe?)
- Desperate Housewives

What are your movies you watch when you're feeling uninspired or in need of a pick me up? Do you only watch certain parts of movies too?

Stressin Out

WeHeartIt Needs Money, I don't have any :(

Trying so hard not to but the stress keeps butting in to my only so strong head. Things on my mind:


+blog isn't pretty or interesting enough (tell me what you like and want to see more of!)
+moving in 27 days
+money money money 
+why previous employers are hiding from/avoiding me
+my mom's constant sadness about one thing or another: lack of help, grandparents steady downhill health marathon, kids always fighting, constant questions about what I'm doing to do in Portland.. etc
+not being able to keep a smile on or keep a cross tone from escaping my lips when talking to my lil brother and sister
+not talking to my at college sister because she's mad at me
+no responses to a craigslist ad
+sleep addiction?


I'm sure there is more but I think that's enough to list for now. Today, even though I'm pretty much flat broke I went to lunch with O from the office. I miss being able to talk to him and C the wonder couple with the most amazing baby EVER! No joke, seriously the cutest thing. I needed lunch because most of today feels like a knock down drag out fight where pessimism is kicking the crap out of positivity. 


I need out of this house. Bad. I need out of this state... bad. I need happy positive situations... REALLY BAD.


Tell me about something positive in your life. I need some happy friends. 

#14 & #15

Today has been perfect, absolutely perfect. I thought I was going to finish it off with reading magazines at Barnes and Noble but alas I was wrong. After B&N I went to the grocery store for dessert supplies:Ben and Jerry's chocolate fudge brownie ice cream

and

fresh raspberries

I came home, showered off then scooped a generous portion of ice cream into my bowl and put a half handful of raspberries on top. Then I ate it, pretty fast. :)

After I finished my dessert I thought I was going to call it a night, but I thought about this small art project I have been wanting to do the past few days and thought I would just outline it on some paper (amazing, thick, beautiful Crane paper... I'm not 100% sure about the thickness but I think it's 120#. Beauuuutiful!

It didn't stop at the outline, I very rarely stop when I start an outline. I should have known. I then decided I could take a sharpie to the rough sketch, then I wanted to paint the background... It's like the book When You Give a Mouse a Cookie... things just keep adding up. After I painted the background I wanted to fill in the letters, so I did. I tore pieces of pretty patterned paper and glued it to the piece...

Once done with one word I had to do another and another until the whole thing was done.

I decided adding the finishing touches wouldn't hurt so I did that too.

Here's how it came out:

Please excuse the poor lighting and the not so great shot of the piece, I am tired and have poor indoor lighting camera skills at the moment.

I'm so glad I did this, so glad I went and saw Eat Pray Love, so glad I went to Barnes and Noble and the library and the post office today. Today was so good.

AND, even better... I can cross something off of my 25 by 25 list! Well, I'm counting it in two sections because not only was this was both painting and collaging (which apparently isn't a word). So one of three down on #14: Make three collages and I now can cross off #15: paint a picture. Exciting? Definitely.

Lastly, while I was in my bathroom washing off my paint brushes and paint holder I was instantly struck with two more paint/collage ideas. I sketched them down right when I got back in my room.

Today was good, today was sooo good.

Goodnight moon. :)

p.s. This saying which is really sticking with my right now is not mine but I found it here and it looks like this:

50 Ways to Build Your Optimism

Found at weheartit

1. Be realistic about your expectations.
2. Accept the past, manage the present and work hard towards the future.
3. Seek for a ray of light/hope in a negative situation. It’s a bit difficult considering all you are going through, but there’s always an opportunity lurking somewhere in the dark.
4. Utilize what you have for now and aspire to grow in every area of your life, remembering you can only swallow food in bits and pieces before taking another big bite.
5. Be authentic, be yourself and stop hiding behind the MASK of pretence.
6. Get infected by being in a network or company of constructive people, because optimism is positively contagious.
7. Have a dream, believe in it and do everything possible under the sun to run with it.
8. Accept you are human with imperfections.
9. Express love towards other people.
10. Be selective of what you read, hear or watch from the media. Excessive media influence could dampen your spirits.
11. Develop the habit of using positive affirmations constructively.
12. Listen to music. It has the ability to make your mind wander a bit. Come on!!! dance to the groove; sing even if it won’t get you auditioned for XFACTOR.
13. Exercise regularly. Taking care of your body mind and soul builds courage and resilience to face the pressures of the world.
14. Avoid living in self denial.
15. Try as much as you can to stay calm when overwhelmed with the issues of life.
16. Be thankful for everything you have, who you are, the people around you…..
17. Develop a sense of humour. Cultivate the habit of laughing or cracking jokes.
18. Spoil yourself and make sure you enjoy doing so. Go on vacations, get a massage, eat out……..
19. Improve yourself at the slightest opportunity you have. Your capacity to succeed in life will depend on your personal drive to take each opportunity as stepping stones to fulfilling your life long dream.
20. Be gracious enough to accept things you cannot change. There will always be things you cannot change no matter how hard you work at it.
21. Reflect and focus on the good things that have occurred in your life.
22. Create a positive attitude.
23. Don’t harbour any form of resentment particularly with issues from the past.
24. Know when to call it quits. Some things aren’t just worth the effort and time you put into it.
25. Occupy yourself with things that bring out the best in you i.e. family, children,friends, travelling, reading etc
26. Focus on creating solutions and not drowning in problems.
27. Be a positive role model to your children, friends, family etc. Be a source of inspiration to people who look up to you.
28. Be good at your job demonstrating your useful skills.
29. Have a hobby to keep you occupied. It could be a form of sport, reading, writing etc.
30. Improve your physical appearance when necessary.
31. Get some rest because it is required to put things in perspective.
32. Learn something new in order increase your knowledge.
33. Be passionate. Embrace life and everything it stands for with love and passion.
34. Show persistence in all your endeavours because it’s one of the keys to happiness.
35. Worry less because it reduces the level of your anxiety..
36. Celebrate the successes of others.
37. Be determined and motivated to excel in all you’ve set out to do.
38. Learn to try out new things.
39. Maximize your success and give attention to your failures remembering that failures are learning experiences that yield positive results if handled properly.
40. Set a goal so that you will have something to look forward to when the going gets rough.
41. Practice the habit of forgiveness.
42. Avoid clutter. Be organized not only with your things but also with your thoughts and your plans.
43. Create a positive environment in your home or office.
44. Read several motivational stories, blogs,quotes….
45. Think positively about who you are.
46. Develop a strong ambition.
47. Visualize happy thoughts. Imagine a picture in your mind what you want to achieve and how you can achieve them. Oftentimes, what you create in your thoughts give birth to what happens in reality.
48. Walk tall, with your head high up exhibiting confidence.
49. Smile as often as you can. It has a way of showing your sincerity.
50. Have a blend of optimism in the way you pick, choose and say your words.

Full article here

The List

<3

Starting to make my 25 to do before 25 list... I missed out on the idea for 24. Should I make a list of 24 semi easy things to do before my birthday? It's really soon, like a month and a half away. I'll give it some thought through the day, see if I just want to make a 25 before 25 to start on the glorious day of my birth.

The picture has something to do with my 25 before 25, if I find myself in more money or able to save it might have two things to do with my 25 before 25. I'm not being clear. I'm sorry, the idea isn't fully clear in my head.

I'm just excited. I take my birthday more serious than Jan.1st.